Thursday, December 3, 2015

Lying & Lion's Den

I am well aware, that On this little Bloggity we talk about lying, cheating, and some Unfortunate things more than anything else. But as mentioned before, these are the ties that bind. And if we can knowingly nod or laugh together, that's worth it to me.

Stevie Nicks sang. "Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies", but I'm almost positive, I've never been told a Sweet Lie. I also know exactly when P is lying to me, and me to him. I guess after 10+ year with a perpetual liar, I have no interest in returning the Favor?
 
I did however, do my best investigative work with him. See we lived apart for over a year. He was working over 2 hours away and had an apartment in the city. The signs were All there something was going on, and yeah, I had my own "extra cirricularrs". After some time I called the management office of the apartment and said I was the Office Manager of his company. I needed the telephone records from the unit to determine if we needed to get him a pre-paid phone card. The records were immediately sent my way and There it Was. You bet I called the number logged numerous times a day, and well into the night. 
Alexis, you sound like you were rode hard and put away wet. Thank god, we never met. 
The things about lying is, it's so simple, or very complicated.
1.A dead give away is if someone has an extremely detailed account about where they were when? Dead obvious lie.
2. If someone has absolutely No detail, where they were, what they did, super casual about it? Totally lying. " We were just chillin". I'm sure.
3. If someone is telling a story, and they are At least 2 parties removed? Super lie. Add a death to this? Totally lying. " My uncles best friend", " "My sister's boss at work"
Is there a special place in hell for people that lie about the dead or undead?? Woof..

My personal favorite involves the number 3. If someone is lying to you they will likely use the number 3. Sounds crazy, I realize. But you'll  listen for it now. " I called like 3 people", or "I tried, like 3 times". You see, 1 attempt to do something is futile. 2 isn't quite enough, but 3, 3 will put you over the edge, to make someone believe you Actually tried.
So if you did try, but you get caught up in it? 
You gotta Own that Sh*t.
One of my favorite lies of All times came about a few years ago. It involved 2 former friends that met at a ball game together in the summer. The friends parked seperately and said their good byes. One friend had the Brilliant (not so much) idea to load someones brand new grill into the trunk of her Grand Am. Who does That? Especially someone that Always wants you to know how much money they(don't ) have. As she celebrated her parking lot loot she texted her friend she had just said Saionara to. The friend chastised her and told her to get the grill back where it was. The girl, felt bad and told the boyfriend to turn the bus around. 2 minutes later, the lights on the on ramp revealed,  there was No returning that Roaster. The grill was in the back of the Grand Am.
Did I mention these 2 are Still friends? ?

Most likely still lying, but not enough to land them in the Lions Den.

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