Wednesday, May 6, 2015

The Cinco I was in the Slammer

Yes.. This actually happened.
And you wonder why I have a blog titled, "This is My life with Coffee".
You can't make this stuff up!
No, It didn't happen this year.
But every year since, I've been hesitant to celebrate Cinco de Mayo 
P and I were just dating,,somewhat seriously for about 6 months.
We still lived separately, so I headed to his house for the night.
We had plans to go somewhere local and get our lime margarita's on.
That's when it started. The drive usually took about 30 minutes with no traffic. Almost as soon as I got on the highway, I realized there was someone (seemingly) inebriated driving in front of me.
The car was swerving from lane to lane with regularity. P knew I was on my way, and warned me about driving near a not so safe driver. After about 10 minutes of trying to maneuver around him, I decided to make a call. I'd never called in a car before, but in this case I deemed it necessary. Don't know how I feel about Drunk Drivers? Read: Drink, & Drive & 25
Because the driver was going through multiple jurisdictions, I got transferred to 3 different stations. They kept me on the phone the entire time  and I was getting frightened about continuing to follow the driver. Turns out, the theory was, my car was keeping him on the road. So meanwhile, the dispatcher was having me dictate all my information. I was tempted several times, to hang up and turn off the highway. However, I drove on. Finally on my exit, they pulled us Both over. I assumed they just wanted a final statement from me, and they'd make the other guy walk the line. well,, it didn't go down quite like That.
Turns out, the driver that was definitely doing some off- roading was "just tired". He had been working in Chicago all day and had just 10 minutes more before he got home. He drove away and I still had 2 sets of police cars cornering me in. You know when an officer starts apologizing to you, it's not going to be good. Apparently, a full year before that Cinco on a wintery day I had received a parking ticket. I never saw the ticket, and because it had gone un-paid, it was now a warrant!!??
And to make matters worse, I had sold that car, to a dealership on a trade 8 months before This!? If there was a warrant, that would have shown up when I traded the car in!?
None the less, with apologies flying, I was felt up(searched), handcuffed, and put in the back of the black car....! You're dying now,right? The officers agreed it was a huge misunderstanding, but the still had to follow Miranda. Ohh and it gets worse. Because I was pulled over in a relatively small community, my arrival at the station was standing room only to watch.
You may not know this,,(I sure didn't) but when your arrested, they take pictures of you...A LOT of pictures. And if you have any skin art, you basically have to strip down so they can take even  more pictures. If your Mothers prompting to always wear clean panties, and MATCHING underwear at all times wasn't enough, stripping down in front of the Police will make it one! Dying....
I was also fingerprinted and even had to disrobe my diamond earrings. Thankfully,,,Thankfully they released me and I had my 1 phone call to make. P was there, forgivingly, in just a few minutes, and  even more fired up than me!
Within several days, the court took mercy on me and was willing to listen to my case. The judge was unusually unnerved, that the time and resources were wasted to try and start a criminal record in my name. The entire arrest and all of it's attributes were thrown out.
So even through it didn't result in a celebratory Cinco de Mayo, and Pete had to sit for a significant amount of time waiting to have tacos with me, I knew it was the right thing to do. Luckily I didn't have to spend too much time in the slammer, and I have one more story to share on Coffee!

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