Drinks tonight found me deep into a discussion about Dating, Doting, and what we do to each other.
I have a Past, you have a Past, we All have a Past. And as much as we try to keep those un- pleasant things, in the Past, sometimes they end up in our present. If you follow me on Pinterest(hint* hint*) you'll enjoy my Board, "i hate quotes", and yes, I Really do Hate quotes. But once in awhile, you read one that Really stings and rings true. This blog could revolve around, "How you treat others, says more about You, than it does about them"
I was in a relationship for 10 years with someone that found it difficult to show affection towards others. I was allowed 3 kisses a day, and he kept a rigid count. Otherwise I was being "too needy". I was a casualty of his continued behavior. I could have decided to continue these behaviors to my next relationship, but I didn't. That baggage, no matter what the designer brand, wasn't continuing into my next nuptial.
I've always said, P makes me a better person and, it wasn't easy to admit that early on. But The sooner I realized that, I wanted it for him and more so for me, made it all worth it. Even in some of the darkest days and the most tense times, I cannot stay mad at him and he makes me cave every time. What's to gain by being a total B? Nothing. It may take some years to get to this.
Treating people in your life poorly, just because you were the product of a patronizing environment, doesn't make it right. The same as an alcoholic does the work and goes to treatment to stay sober, someone who treats others poorly, can re- wire and do the work to change the course of the future. Can you imagine continuing a condescending environment? If you make apologies or amends for how you treat others just because of a way you were once treated, you will likely be living a life alone.