Thursday, February 13, 2014

Adios, my Friend

When I was in my 20's I was "One of the Boys".  Every Saturday night, Me and The Boys would venture out to drink 2 for $7 pitchers of beer. I Hate Beer, and have a awful allergy to it. There was a point where I even Lived with 3 boys!! 3 boys, 1 girl, and One bathroom! We actually had a pretty sweet bathroom. And I was totally okay with it. I hated girls. They all had "Drama" and issues, and judgment, and I didn't think any of them were worth it.
Of course as a more, err,, mature adult now I know, their judgment and drama were all self fulfilled. I have decided that now, after building the relationships that I have with a few Select females, if you have crossed 30 and are unable to have relationships with girls, there's something wrong with You. Yes there are still girls out there with their judgment and drama, but let em' have it, because it's all they've got. Say Adios.
A few years ago I was very best friends with a girl and we had raucous fun for about 2 years. We were both at a cross roads in our current relationships and had decided to 'take back the night" of sorts. We were inseparable and talked 2-3 times a day and spent every weekend together. I realized that I was her Wingman. I was the one she needed to go out with in order to romance her new love interest. When she asked me for my opinion of him, I was Honest. This guy had a new woman living with him every 6-8 months to help cover his mortgage. This guy wore white linen pants,,with No underwear!! And.. this guy had All his pants hemmed straight across, no fall over his shoe!!(the horror)So I let her know I didn't think he had anything to "offer". In the end, she won over her man, and decided to say Adios to our friendship. Sucks.
I had a recent discussion with my best friend, about 2 other friends that also were at a cross roads. These  had been friends for over 15 years, and the one decided to call it quits. The one had, had enough. She couldn't take all of the late night crying calls about her husband being unfaithful. She couldn't give anymore of the advice that seemed to fall on deaf ears and all the Tough Talks. She was exhausted after seeing a bad situation turn worse year after year, and had to throw in the towel.
So she did the honorable thing, and sat her friend down. She was honest and told her, "I don't want your drama anymore, I can't watch you sit and do nothing another day, and I can't listen to you complain about the Same thing for 15 more years". She was saying Adios to their friendship in the nicest possible way.
I have encourage friends recently to re- evaluate their friendships. I've listened to them complain and be disappointed by the actions of others. I have witnessed someone giving the benefit of the doubt two and three times over to someone underserving. If someone is in your life and doing absolutely nothing for you, if someone you consider a friend is doing absolutely nothing to enhance that friendship. And if that person isn't putting half the time and consideration into you, that you do them?
Then it's definitely time to say Adios, and have a margarita with someone Else.

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